Hippiemommy

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  • Imaginative and Non-Toy Play

    I’ve been thinking a lot about this topic ever since it came up on GCM. I was shocked to see that my kids are possibly in the minority when it comes to non-toy play. In that thread, which asked what kids do if they don’t have toys, I wrote

    I think my kids would do great without any toys at all. They have way more fun when it is just the two of them.

    We have a LOT of dinosaur play around here. They made up this one game (which is probably played for several hours a day) where one pretends to be a certain dinosaur and the other tries to guess which one. A variation on that is for them to go off and decide what dinosaur to be and then dh or I have to guess what they are.

    They absolutely adore spelling things out on the refrigerator don't know They love to sing and dance if I put on music or they make up their own songs if not. They pretend to be animals, or pretend to be completely made-up things with made-up names. They tickle-fight and blow raspberries or play hide-and-seek They read books constantly. They will pretend with anything.

    On our cross-country trip (5,000+ miles in the car with no toys), they made “toys” out of seatbelt ends, shoes, whatever! They do that around the house too – they’ll make pretend things out of pillows, their hands, socks, whatever. We have SO many toys here, but they just aren’t preferred don't know

    They also love to practice jumping and tumbling. They jump over each other or try to do headstands or whatever happy smile

    Its good stuff. Its what I remember doing as a child too

    As I read through the responses, I saw that many kids do not play in that way. It has really been nagging me, because I remember how much my brother and I played that way when we were little. We didn’t need things that told us how to play, we just played. Right now, as I type, my kids are downstairs playing leapfrog and pretending to be dinosaurs. Life would be so boring if they only played with toys!

    I recently started reading How to Grow a Young Reader by Kathryn Lindskoog, and I’m still withholding judgement, but this section spoke to me and made me wonder if maybe some of the kids who don’t do much imaginative play just haven’t had a chance to develop the skills yet.

    Author and scientist Isaac Asimov brushed aside the menace of widespread television addiction by claiming that, without television, people who watch a lot of it would be doing other things equally as empty–such as staring into space. He assumed that they would be passive even without their television sets, accomplishing nothing.

    That is a radical assumption to make… in fact, people who have to do without television for a time generally resort to reading, hobbies, games, studies, longer family dinners, earlier bedtimes, and even improved sex lives, according to some reports.

    I’m sure I’ll get all sorts of great google hits now that I have the phrase “improved sex lives” on here, lol.  Seriously though, this is very true in my life, except replace the word “television” with “computer”  ;)  We do much better with less electronics.

    Asimove seems to be considering children as basically inactive because children watch television more than any other group. But when they are not watching television, children are about the busiest people in the world. They are constantly exploring themselves and their environment, chattering, reflecting, insisting, and probably keeping at least one adult very busy. Their brains, the most complicated things on earth, are developing daily. Most of their healthy growth activity falls into one category — play. Play is child’s work.

    So I am wondering now if there is some kind of correlation between the types of play that kids engage in and what they are doing during the day. I started thinking back to when my kids were watching a lot more tv (or it was at least on in the background). Back then, many of their games reflected what they watched on tv. They were not very imaginative, and when they played it was usually with toys. Of course, this doesn’t prove that the two are related, but I started thinking about it as I read.

    So now I’ve been pondering whether or not passive activities (like tv or computer usage) can make the initial transition to free play more difficult. As my mind considered this thought, I came across this quote in The Simple Living Guide by Janet Luhrs

    An added benefit to less TV is, surprisingly enough, boredom. Keep reading! Boredom is especially good for children. Jerry Mander, who wrote Four Arguments for the Elimination of Television, said this:

    …Slowly, I’d slip into a kind of boredom that seemed awful. An anxiety went with it, and a gnawing tension in the stomach. It was exceedingly unpleasant, so unpleasant that I would eventually decide to act–to do something. I’d call a friend, I’d go outdoors. I’d go play ball. I’d read. I would do something.

    Looking back, I view that time of boredom, of “nothing to do,” as the pit out of which creative action springs.

    …Nowadays, however, at the onset of that uncomfortable feeling, kids usually reach for the TV switch. TV blots out both the anxiety and the creativity that might follow.

    So I know what I’ll be pondering for the rest of the day (while keeping my tv and computer off)…

  • D’oh!

    My links were broken so no one could comment!  I’m so sorry!  It should be fixed now  🙂

  • “The criminalization of natural play”

    I just started reading Last Child in the Woods, and I am finding it enjoyable so far. I’m not sure if it is going to make it on my “favorites” list, but I think he makes some really good points about the way that childhood has changed in the past few generations. My mom has stories of spending the whole day on homemade boats in the canal systems in Miami. My dad has stories about going shrimping at night and building tree houses all day. My brother and I are a step further removed. We have stories of treehouses made of treated lumber and playing in the woods, but they were torn down during our elementary school years. When we moved we no longer had access to any woods, and most outdoor games were not allowed by the homeowners association. Now my children experience the woods through our backyard open space and hiking, but it is not the same as it was when my brother and I explored. Each generation is getting further away from the creative play in nature and more into outdoors activities that are more rigid in scope. Obviously my kids don’t get to explore too much on our hikes because much of the land is protected.

    Richard Louv talks about the many reasons for our change, but I wanted to write about his discussion of private (homeowners association) laws that have changed the way that kids play. I think I find it particularly interesting because the same thing happened to my family when we moved.

    A few years after moving to Scripps Ranch, Rick started reading articles in the community’s newsletter about the “illegal use” of open space. “Unlike where we had lived before, kids were actually out there running around in the trees, building forts, and playing with their imaginations,” he recalls. “They were putting up bike ramps to make jumps. They were damming up trickles of water to float boats. In other words, they were doing all the things we used to do as kids. They were creating for themselves all those memories that we cherish so fondly.” And now it had to stop. “Somehow,” says Rick, “that tree house was now a fire hazard. Or the ‘dam’ might cause severe flooding.”

    I wonder when this happened, because I remember a similar dynamic in the late-80s and mid-90s in our neighborhoods. All of the sudden you needed a permit for everything.

    Authoritative adults from the Scripps Ranch Community Association chased kids away from a little pond near the public library, where children had fished for bluegills since Scripps Ranch had been a working cattle spread many decades earlier. In response to the tightened regulations, families erected basketball hoops. Young people moved the skateboard ramps to the foot of their driveways. But the community association reminded the residents that such activities violated the covenants they had signed when they bought their houses.

    Down came the ramps and poles; and indoors went the kids.

    I find this funny because my parents were ticketed for our basketball court in the mid-90s. My dad had to take it down. It sucked. My dad and I used to play at night before bedtime, and the community association fined and ticketed us for our hoop. There was no legal way to have a hoop, so my parents had to take it down. That was such a bummer.

    I was thinking about this the other day because my kids were interested in the native grasses that grow in the canal behind our house. They wanted to pick them and investigate them, and I realized that it was probably illegal for them to pick the grasses. I’m pretty sure that when I read our open space laws that there was a clause that said that you can’t pick or cut any of the vegetation. Its a little sad because that is how my brother and I learned so much about the world around us. I understand why these small areas of remaining nature have to be protected, and it is because there is so little other nature around most neighborhoods that even a few grass pickings here and there can be a big deal if every kid at the thousand or so houses nearby did it.

    Similarly we have forced wild animals to live very close to our houses since they don’t have much land left. At night we often hear coyotes right behind our house. I’m sure that if they had thousands of acres to choose from then they wouldn’t want to be in our backyard, but there aren’t many other options for them here. That means that playing in these spaces is less safe for my kids because the wildlife is much more dense. Louv talks about this as well, but I’ll save that for some other time.

    So anyways, I’m finding the book interesting. I think that we are far better off than the majority of Americans when it comes to nature because Colorado is known for its great open spaces and nature. My kids are able to do a lot more than most children their age. At the same time, it is a little sad to realize how different childhood has become in the past 50 years.

  • My homeschooling blog

    I decided that I wanted to split my blog, so I made a new domain 🙂 I’ve been sitting on it for a while so that I could decide how I want to use it. I ultimately decided that I will use it to record our daily accomplishments as well as my lesson plans/checklist for the day. I have been keeping a paper copy, which is driving me nuts! I do much better in digital format.

    I have our recently read books on the sidebar at the new site. If you have a child who is just starting to read, then that may be helpful. I have been wanting to track them, but it didn’t make sense to put them on my sidebar since most of what I talk about here has to do with adult books.

    Anyways, if you want to check it out, here is the link:

    http://www.mycrazyday.com/

    Realistically, I don’t expect anyone to find this interesting except for me, lol. It is not a place for deep thoughts or great wisdom. 😉 We are working through Teach a Child to Read with Children’s Books and Ambleside Year 1 on a modified (slow) schedule, so if you are using either program then it might possibly be a help. I also intend to upload a lot of the paperwork and schedules that we are using, so that may end up being a good resource. 🙂

    Feel free to let me know if you have any ideas for things that you’d like to see on the new site, and I’ll try to work it in 🙂

  • Nothing but love for “Teach a Child to Read with Children’s Books”

    I can’t even tell you how much I love this program!

    We started our reading program by using Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons.  It sucked the fun out of the room.  We were getting the job done, but it was not enjoyable for anyone.  I decided to back off when my ds said that he didn’t like it, but I was afraid that we were going to have to go back to it and that he’d be miserable.  I am so thankful that a friend recommended Teach a Child to Read with Children’s Books.  That simple recommendation helped us to make a wonderful u-turn in our reading lessons.  Hallelujah!

    The idea behind TaCtRwCB (how’s that for an abbreviation?) is that you use actual children’s books and not dry readers.  He goes through an entire sample lesson based on a program that has been used in some public schools when they were able to give one-on-one attention.  The elements of each lesson include books that your child knows well, books that they recently learned, word building based on those books, writing small stories, and then introducing a new book.  It uses a mix of phonics and sight-reading to help them build their vocabulary.

    The wonderful thing about the skill level of the books is that they start with ones that are repetitive and use words that many kids know.  That means that they can have the accomplishment of reading an entire book from the beginning of the program.  That is so much more satisfying than just reading nonsensical words (“….ab….”, “….ar….”)  Although we’ve officially been doing the program with my 5yo, my 3yo has picked it up just from watching.  She is now able to read as well.  Both of them beg for me to start our lessons for the day, and they are sad when we finish our books.  I wake up in the morning to them asking if the library has any new books on hold for us that they can read.  It is so phenomenal to see the difference between the way that they approached 100 Easy Lessons and the way that they are approaching this method.  They love it, and this is what I dreamed of for our homeschooling experience.

    When we retire a book or run out of new books, then I just look at the lists in the back and pick a book that is the appropriate level.  I place them on hold at the library and keep them in a basket next to our couch to become our new book that we introduce at the end of each lesson.  It takes very little planning, and the kids enjoy going through the basket to pick which book they think we should read next.

    We do most of our word building with magnetic letters on the fridge.  When there is a word that they are stuck on or that keeps popping up, then we work on it and on the entire word family on the fridge at the end of our lesson.

    So yeah, I highly recommend this book.  My son already knew his letter sounds when we started, and my daughter knew some of them, but the book guides you through it even if you’re not to that point yet.  I’d love to hear from you if you try it!

  • A free replacement for LibraryThing

    http://www.shelfari.com/

    I really like this site!  It imports your LT bookshelf with just a click, and the layout is much more user-friendly.  Did I also mention that it is free no matter how many books you have?  It allows you to see discussions about the books that you are reading or have read, and some of them are pretty interesting.

    Let me know if you join and we’ll buddy up!

  • Where did my granola recipe go?!

    This is one of my most popular links, and it somehow disappeared.  Oh well.  Here’s a repost  🙂

    INGREDIENTS

    * 3 cups rolled oats
    * 1 cup chopped walnuts
    * 1/4 cup wheat germ
    * 1 (14 ounce) package flaked coconut
    * 6 tablespoons pure maple syrup
    * 6 tablespoons packed dark brown sugar
    * 1/4 cup vegetable oil
    * 2 tablespoons warm water
    * 1/2 teaspoon salt

    Mix the first 4 ingredients in one bowl and everything else in another.  Toss them together and put them on a greased cookie sheet with short sides.  Bake at 250, stirring every 15 minutes until crunchy (an hour to an hour and a half).  Its really good if you toss in some dried cranberries (or any other fruit) too  🙂

    I keep it in glass mason jars and it stays fresh for quite a long time.  Enjoy!

  • Soy haters!

    Ugh! This is so true and upsetting all at once. Take a moment to read about this study.

    …For these studies, the wrappers of 155 PowerBars were modified to say either “Contains 10 grams of protein” or “Contains 10 grams of soy protein.” The only difference between the two labels was one prominent, three-letter word, “soy.” In reality, there was no soy protein in this PowerBar. Exactly zero. It was a phantom ingredient. If after eating one of these PowerBars, people believed they tasted soy, they would be mindlessly responding to the power of suggestion.

    OK, just to recap, there is NO SOY in these bars. Some just claimed to have in on the label.

    People were given the bars (which were introduced as a new product) and asked to take a look at the package, and then to try them. The people who ate the bars with the label “Contains 10 grams of protein” described the bars favorably: They said they were chocolaty, chewy, and tasty. The other people, the ones who had been given the bars with “10 grams of soy protein” were not so positive. Many spit out the bar, or excused themselves to get a drink of water. One man passed a piece of gum to his wife so that both could get the taste out of their mouths. When asked what they thought, they claimed that the bars had a bad aftertaste, were chalky, and didn’t even taste like chocolate.

    I have experienced this in real life. Most people who eat at my house are eating a soy product. I usually choose not to share this information (I know they aren’t allergic or anything) because as soon as they find out, people start complaining about aftertastes or something being “off”. When they don’t know, they go on and on about how its the best ____ they’ve ever had. I’ve even had it where people were asking for fourths or fifths of a dish and asked about ingredients and I’d mention soy-something and they’d change their mind on wanting more. Rawr!

    Apparently soy has two strikes when you’re dealing with men, because they also think it is a sissy food.

    …We soon discovered that personality identification explains why it’s harder to get men to eat soy than women. To the strong, traditional, macho, biceps-flexing, all-American male, red meat is a strong, traditional, macho, biceps-flexing, all-American food. Soy is not. To eat it, they would have to give up a food they saw as strong and powerful, like themselves, for a food they saw as weak and wimpy.

    Hel-lo, if you feel that you are not macho enough to eat soy, then methinks the soy is not the issue, my friend.

    Listen, I don’t think soy is the perfect food. I think that many of the fake meats and such are quite nutritionally questionable. Still, I find it pretty fascinating that people have such a strong reaction to soy. Its in practically everything we eat, but somehow it spooks people out. Its so strange.

  • Comfort foods

    Today I was reading in Mindless Eating about comfort foods and the differences between what women choose and what men choose.

    What’s the big difference between men and women? When asked why they preferred pizza, pasta, and soup over cakes and cookies, men generally talked about how good they tasted and how filling they were. But when we probed a bit deeper, many also said that when they ate these foods they felt “spoiled,” “pampered,” “taken care of,” or “waited on.” Generally they associated these foods with being the focus of attention from either the mother or wife.

    And women? Although they liked hot-meal comfort foods just fine, these foods did not carry the associations of being “spoiled,” “taken care of,” or “waited on.” In fact, quite the opposite. When women thought of these foods, they were reminded of the work they or their mothers had to do to produce them. These foods didn’t represent comfort, they represented preparation and cleanup.

    For women, snacklike foods–candy, cookies, ice cream, chocolate–were hassly-free. Part of their comfort was to not have to make or clean up anything. It was both effortless and mindless eating.

    Isn’t that interesting? Men chose foods that made them feel cared for or spoiled. As I think of Joe’s favorite foods, they are all warm and full meals. Mine are not. Last week I made lasagna because he asked for it, and I couldn’t fathom why someone would want lasagna when it is 99 degrees outside. I even talked to some friends at my yoga class about how all I want is a salad or to eat out. I need to keep our different preferences in mind, even if Joe’s tastes sometimes confuse me. I do this for my children, but I don’t always think a ton about Joe’s preferences, especially since he likes a lot of unhealthy comfort foods. Making those foods healthy and serving his comfort foods is another little way of honoring my family 🙂 I hadn’t really considered the deeper “why’s” behind that before.

    In Turansky and Miller’s Say Goodbye to Whining, they point out that the Bible tells us many times to love, honor, serve, and encourage others. I sometimes think of that as being a loftier goal than it is. The fact is that many of my day-to-day decisions can be done in a more honoring way. They say,

    It’s amazing how one family member can behin a chain reaction of change, resulting in a greater sense of honor. Maybe that one family member is you.

    There are so many little ways to show honor and love. I am glad that I am starting to recognize some more ways to do this. It blesses me to bless my family.  Who would’ve thought that a book on subconscious eating preferences would give me more ideas on how to bless my family?

  • God’s will be done

    Last night I had a terrible nightmare that included one of my children being hurt.  The thought of my children hurting is a million times worse than the thought of my own hurt.  Even if I consider the possibility of my own death, the part that pains me the most is the pain that my children would feel.

    So I awoke from my nightmare and started praying a drunkenly-tired prayer, which came out all wrong and only upset me more.  I am terrible when I am sleepy.  I know that lots of people do their best prayers at night, but I usually fall asleep trying.  I try to tell myself that it is like drifting off asleep on the phone with someone you love, but I still feel a twinge of guilt for falling asleep to the almighty King.  I checked on the kids and kissed them on their cheeks.  Then I came back to bed and asked Joe to pray with me.  My feeble attempt at a prayer had basically been one of protection.  Joe started praying, and his was all about the will of God.  I was struck by how his life experiences, including the death of his sister, have obviously given him a more mature perspective on prayer.  He also prayed that God protect the kids, but his focus was just so different than my focus.

    After his prayer, I fell asleep easily (and wasn’t crying anymore).  I woke up this morning and decided finish Facing East by Frederica Mathewes-Green.  I have learned so much from this book, and it has been great to get an insider’s view of orthodoxy.  I’m still not convinced that it would ever be a fit for me, but I view orthodoxy very differently than I did before I started.  I can also see how the desire for something more rooted and historical could lead a person to an Eastern Orthodox church.  For me this desire has led to my Jewish roots, but I think that the basic desire for depth is the same.

    In one of the chapters that I read today, she talks about what she will pray for in the upcoming year,

    As C. S. Lewis says of the Christ-figure Aslan in the Narnia tales, “It’s not like he’s a tame lion.”  All over the world, millions of times a day, people are praying, “Thy will be done.”  And I think I can dispute that?  Like, “Oh, I’m an exception.”  If I’m stubborn enough, I can get my will done instead?

    Isn’t it interesting that I was just thinking the same thing earlier today?  It really is humbling.  The truth is that if my dream were God’s will, then I’d have to accept it.  I think I can get really sucked into our whole name-it-and-claim-it inspired brand of Christianity that does not reflect the truth of God’s character at all.  I know many earnest Christians who did not want to die or be hurt and yet it still happened.  Desire doesn’t change it.  At least I can rest knowing that God knows best and that I do not need to fear.  Letting go is a tough lesson though.

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