As I’ve mentioned, I am reading Turansky and Miller’s Say Goodbye right now, so I wanted to keep talking about it 🙂
In Say Goodbye, there is an overwhelming theme that includes the idea that honor does more than what is expected. I really like this definition of honor, because I think it would be very easy to teach children (and adults!) I’ve been working on expressing honor in my life, and I hope that my positive example will be the first way that I teach my kids about honor. Reading this book has shown me a lot of places where we are honorable (and a lot of places that are lacking in honor.)
I am a very task-oriented person. I like checklists. I like accomplishing things. I do not like to dillydaddle. Hanging around and doing stuff that is not required is a pretty difficult thought to wrap my brain around. Its not that I want to skimp on things, its just that I want finish it completely and move on to the next task. I like to get things done.
This is pretty much the opposite of what Turansky and Miller are suggesting we should do in order to honor each other. Honor is all about doing something extra. This is a very people-oriented line of thought. This has made me think.
I am assuming that their approach will be much easier to put into action if your children are people oriented. If your kids naturally want to please, want to be around people, and want to focus on people, then I think it’ll be easy to teach them to take that next step. My son, for example, naturally does much of what is in the book. Its his personality. My dh is the same way. My dd and I do not naturally gravitate towards those types of ideas. We want to finish and move on.
I guess what I’m trying to figure out is if that is really wrong. I am trying to think of ways for my dd and I to use our own natural inclinations to still show honor. I am sure it is possible. It just hasn’t really been covered a whole lot. Or maybe honor will just be more difficult for us? It won’t come as naturally as it does for some? Hmmm. Lots to consider.
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